Take Pride and Stop Settling!!

1st off this is not about anyone in particular just my thoughts at the time if it offends anyone or gets under you skin I’m sorry!!! That’s my disclaimer lol

Alright so I wrote a blog a while back entitled “Man Up” and needless to say I received a lot of feed back from the women oh but you had to know your day was coming! I hate when a woman walks around feeling sorry for herself because some nothing ass dude has “broken her heart”! I think that is the biggest yet most frequently used bunch of bs I have ever heard! I mean for real ok it didn’t work out build a bridge and get over that ish! Why would you sit around and waste time and tears while the guy has moved on and is enjoying his life without you?? The funny thing is a lot of women claim they are mad and are frustrated with the guy in their life yet they can’t seem to let go. Why do women continue to settle for a “man” that they say do not treat them right? Why would you want to be second or even third place for a guy whom you know has no intention of changing or settling down with you? How can you continue to let a guy talk bad to you and blatantly do stuff to disrespect you and then say “I know he loves me” or things like “it wasn’t always like this”? True enough in the beginning it may have been all good but what about now? If it is not all good now why stick around? I’m not saying just up and run when stuff gets bad because if you do that you will never have anything meaningful in life but what I am saying is if you are in a situation where you have tried to reason and you have given the benefit of the doubt and things seem to be getting worse why are you there? The saying is kind of cliché’ but you can do bad all by yourself. Seriously though its time out for all of the excuses that you make for a man. If it is not what you want or a situation that you know you should not be in then GET OUT!! It may be hard at first with the lonely nights and stuff like that but in the long run you will feel better about yourself and you will probably start to find more time to focus on doing the things that make you happy.

Another thing that irks me is a triflin’ woman!! Ladies get it together at least make an effort to keep yourself up. There is nothing sexier to me than a woman who reeks of confidence and who keeps her hair, hands, and toes done! Ladies take time out for yourself and get pampered! Go and have a spa day where you have a nice massage or something of that nature. That to me shows that you really care about yourself! Now don’t get it twisted I’m not saying go and cake on piles of make up because that ish really is not cute. I would rather see you with the natural beauty if you want to put on a little eye liner or some lip liner or something that’s cool, but for these women who are walking around with all this excess makeup on looking like a damn clown come on CUT IT OUT it is not cute!!

I also get tired of women blaming their shortcomings on their “baby daddy”. If you have a child by a dude that is not in your child’s life true enough it is an unfortunate situation but by all means don’t use that as an excuse!! I can guarantee that you are not the first “single” parent and you damn sure won’t be the last. Being a single parent should actually motivate you more to go out and work harder to provide the kind of life that you want for you and your child. It’s funny how so many women say “my baby daddy aint shit” and “I am struggling trying to raise this/these child/children on my own” yet you still allow him to come through late night and have “adult time” with you…why? Chances are you knew the dude was nothing before you laid up with him and got pregnant so why are you so shocked that he is not there now? It is also frustrating when a woman claims she can barely make ends meet yet she is in the club every week! Of course by her going to the club she has to go and buy a new outfit and sit at the beauty shop to get the do did but her child is walking around looking like a raggedy Ann doll. Hair all nappy, old clothing, and worn shoes!! For real…where are your priorities?

Come on ladies woman up stop making excuses and saying what you cannot do and why you cannot do it!! Take time out re-evaluate the things and people in your life and if you feel as if they do not fit or they are not doing you any good get rid of it!! Instead of chasing up behind a man and making things so “easy” sit back get yourself together and make us work! Believe me when I tell you this THE ONES WHO ARE REALLY INTERESTED IN GETTING TO KNOW YOU WILL WORK TO TEAR DOWN WHATEVER WALLS YOU HAVE BUILT!! Now everyone has slip ups there are times when you just have “chemistry” and you want to have an “experience” with a guy but if that is the case then take it for what it is and stop thinking that you are “the one” because really that is not the case!!

To the women who “get it” congratulations!! You realize that when the time is right your prince charming will come along probably when you least expect it and he will sweep you off of your feet and there will be no doubt that he is Mr. Right! You understand what being a woman is all about and you know how to keep a man happy. Although you may not be quite where you want to be right now you do have GOALS and you are working to ACHIEVE those goals. You understand that stock options and a retirement plan are more important than getting in clubs free or riding on 24’s. You are not running up behind a man and letting him dictate your life because you have your priorities together and you are focused on living your life for you, loving yourself, and working on your future! Women you are the BEST THING that has ever happened to man act like it and quit settling for less than you are truly worth!!

Memphis: A Big City Wannabe?

Ok what’s really going on in my city? You know I hear mayor Herenton saying Memphis is a big city and we are doing big things but I am simply not seeing it!!! Ok true enough he got us a professional sports team, (which we half support) a new arena, and the downtown beautification project seems to be going well but what about the small stuff. I’m talking about the things that the citizens of Memphis deal with on a daily basis. Ok thanks Mayor Herenton for this new arena but hey did we think about the parking garage that goes along with it? How about the congestion downtown because the geniuses of the Memphis police department want to block off all the streets downtown to “control” traffic. Does anyone else see the issue with blocking off the streets that would make it easier to navigate to and from downtown? Another thing why does it take a long time to do ANYTHING dealing with the government in Memphis? I was at the unemployment office for 5 eff’n hours last week. In case you missed it FIVE hours to speak to someone about getting unemployment. The bad part about the whole ordeal is that when I finally went to the back I was only back there maybe 15 minutes so what in the heck were they doing with the people before me. Furthermore on the unemployment website there is a link to file online in Memphis but when you click on it you get a message that says this feature is not available at this time!!! How stupid is that? This is 2009 and we (the city of Memphis, Shelby county, or whoever is in charge of that page cannot get a freakin’ weblink to work) I am starting to believe the Memphis government has the Memphis club mentality we will make sure we have a long line so people will want to come in!!! Speaking of the clubs here why does it take so long for “security” to get the people in the clubs? I mean with everything that goes on in these clubs the searches they do cannot be that thorough. I have been to clubs and other parties in other cities (New Orleans, Atlanta, Chicago, even Nashville) and have never waited in line as long as I did in Memphis. That was back in my younger days I don’t club nearly as much as I used to so I really don’t care what they do now. I am concerned about the quality of nightlife/entertainment for those who do not like clubs or for those who want to be in a laid back adult atmosphere. What are those people to do for fun? I am currently dating a woman who hates clubs but she loves music. Where are we supposed to go to just chill have a drink and maybe do a little dancing and just enjoy each other’s company? The movies and dinner get old really quick and this young lady has said she wants a man who will date her for 50 years. Not meaning she wants to just date forever meaning that if something blossoms and we settle down she still wants her and her husband to date and do the things that got them to that point and I can respect that but in Memphis damn that may be hard!!! The only thing big city about Memphis is the crime rate!! Is it me or do we (Memphis) need to step our game off before we start shooting off and want to be recognized as a big city????

What has happened to the music industry?

On Saturday I enjoyed an afternoon of listening to music with a good friend. While sitting around we got to pulling out cds and listening to “old school” music. Now when I say old school I’m not talking about our parents music (which a lot of us grew up on) I’m talking our old “new” school. Artists like H-Town (knockin’ da boots) Tevin Campbell, Tony Toni Tone, Uncle Sam, Sam Salter, Jesse Powell, Shai, Donnell Jones, Rome, Jodeci, Mint Condition (breaking my heart) okay ya’ll get the picture. Don’t get me wrong we enjoyed the rap as well DJ Jimi (“where they at” and “there’s some garden tools in this house” lmao, the old no limit ( silk the shocker, master p, mia x the pre lil romeo era lol), a couple of Memphis classics Mr. Big (eightball and MJG) getting it on (playa fly) act like you don’t know. Songs for the most part that would either get your party started or make you wanna grab somebody and hold em’ close!!! What happened to that? These days any ole Joe off the street can make a song and “hot” 107 (and I use that word hot very loosely) will give it plenty of airtime. Now I’m not hating if this is how they making money go ahead and do ya thang but damn come with some substance. I mean come on “that baby don’t look like me WTF? The song was funny and all but geez should it really be in every hour hell OR everyday rotation?  Soulja boy give me a break how many times could you possibly crank anything?!!! And also what’s up with all of the nursery rhyme hooks? Is there a new rap manual out that says in order to make a hit you have to find a lullaby and make a song out of it?!!! Lets not talk about the R&B circuit. True enough we have good young talented artists like Jazmine Sullivan and Trey Songz to go along with seasoned vets like Alicia Keys, Ne-Yo, Beyonce’, Musiq Soulchild, Mary J., Usher, John Legend etc.who can flat out sang and entertain. There are also sleepers like Pretty Willie, Urban Mystic, and Raheem Devaughn who can hold there own and set a mood LOL but the thing that kills me are these jokers who just mess R&B all up!!! The perfect example is Pretty Ricky. First off how you gone name yourself Pretty Ricky and there are like 35 of ya’ll in the group. Secondly are you singers or rappers? Unfortunately someone listens to their garbage so they stay around. Last thing and I’m going to leave them alone where in the heck do you get off remaking classics like H-Town’s “knocking da boots” and adding rap verses to it *sigh* and what may be worse is On BET the new member had the nerve to start singing Mint Condition’s pretty brown eyes and sounded a hot mess!!!! I’m sorry but if this is the quality product being put out these days I see why limewire and other file sharing sites are so big how could you expect someone to spend his or her hard earned money on this garbage. What happened to the days of putting a 12 or 13 song cd in and letting it play. Now you buy a cd with 16-20 songs on it and may only listen to 3… the madness must stop somebody help me out!!!!