1st off this is not about anyone in particular just my thoughts at the time if it offends anyone or gets under you skin I’m sorry!!! That’s my disclaimer lol
Alright so I wrote a blog a while back entitled “Man Up” and needless to say I received a lot of feed back from the women oh but you had to know your day was coming! I hate when a woman walks around feeling sorry for herself because some nothing ass dude has “broken her heart”! I think that is the biggest yet most frequently used bunch of bs I have ever heard! I mean for real ok it didn’t work out build a bridge and get over that ish! Why would you sit around and waste time and tears while the guy has moved on and is enjoying his life without you?? The funny thing is a lot of women claim they are mad and are frustrated with the guy in their life yet they can’t seem to let go. Why do women continue to settle for a “man” that they say do not treat them right? Why would you want to be second or even third place for a guy whom you know has no intention of changing or settling down with you? How can you continue to let a guy talk bad to you and blatantly do stuff to disrespect you and then say “I know he loves me” or things like “it wasn’t always like this”? True enough in the beginning it may have been all good but what about now? If it is not all good now why stick around? I’m not saying just up and run when stuff gets bad because if you do that you will never have anything meaningful in life but what I am saying is if you are in a situation where you have tried to reason and you have given the benefit of the doubt and things seem to be getting worse why are you there? The saying is kind of cliché’ but you can do bad all by yourself. Seriously though its time out for all of the excuses that you make for a man. If it is not what you want or a situation that you know you should not be in then GET OUT!! It may be hard at first with the lonely nights and stuff like that but in the long run you will feel better about yourself and you will probably start to find more time to focus on doing the things that make you happy.
Another thing that irks me is a triflin’ woman!! Ladies get it together at least make an effort to keep yourself up. There is nothing sexier to me than a woman who reeks of confidence and who keeps her hair, hands, and toes done! Ladies take time out for yourself and get pampered! Go and have a spa day where you have a nice massage or something of that nature. That to me shows that you really care about yourself! Now don’t get it twisted I’m not saying go and cake on piles of make up because that ish really is not cute. I would rather see you with the natural beauty if you want to put on a little eye liner or some lip liner or something that’s cool, but for these women who are walking around with all this excess makeup on looking like a damn clown come on CUT IT OUT it is not cute!!
I also get tired of women blaming their shortcomings on their “baby daddy”. If you have a child by a dude that is not in your child’s life true enough it is an unfortunate situation but by all means don’t use that as an excuse!! I can guarantee that you are not the first “single” parent and you damn sure won’t be the last. Being a single parent should actually motivate you more to go out and work harder to provide the kind of life that you want for you and your child. It’s funny how so many women say “my baby daddy aint shit” and “I am struggling trying to raise this/these child/children on my own” yet you still allow him to come through late night and have “adult time” with you…why? Chances are you knew the dude was nothing before you laid up with him and got pregnant so why are you so shocked that he is not there now? It is also frustrating when a woman claims she can barely make ends meet yet she is in the club every week! Of course by her going to the club she has to go and buy a new outfit and sit at the beauty shop to get the do did but her child is walking around looking like a raggedy Ann doll. Hair all nappy, old clothing, and worn shoes!! For real…where are your priorities?
Come on ladies woman up stop making excuses and saying what you cannot do and why you cannot do it!! Take time out re-evaluate the things and people in your life and if you feel as if they do not fit or they are not doing you any good get rid of it!! Instead of chasing up behind a man and making things so “easy” sit back get yourself together and make us work! Believe me when I tell you this THE ONES WHO ARE REALLY INTERESTED IN GETTING TO KNOW YOU WILL WORK TO TEAR DOWN WHATEVER WALLS YOU HAVE BUILT!! Now everyone has slip ups there are times when you just have “chemistry” and you want to have an “experience” with a guy but if that is the case then take it for what it is and stop thinking that you are “the one” because really that is not the case!!
To the women who “get it” congratulations!! You realize that when the time is right your prince charming will come along probably when you least expect it and he will sweep you off of your feet and there will be no doubt that he is Mr. Right! You understand what being a woman is all about and you know how to keep a man happy. Although you may not be quite where you want to be right now you do have GOALS and you are working to ACHIEVE those goals. You understand that stock options and a retirement plan are more important than getting in clubs free or riding on 24’s. You are not running up behind a man and letting him dictate your life because you have your priorities together and you are focused on living your life for you, loving yourself, and working on your future! Women you are the BEST THING that has ever happened to man act like it and quit settling for less than you are truly worth!!
There is a certain gift that you do not get on birthdays, anniversaries, or Christmas! This gift does not come in a box or gift-wrapped and it normally comes when you least expect it! This gift is not a physical gift yet you can still see and feel it!! This particular gift is probably the most fragile gift you will ever receive however this gift cannot be bought in stores, online, or anywhere else for that matter! Personally I think this is one of the most precious gifts you can ever receive and it takes a special person to accept this gift. The person receiving this gift has to be strong, willing to listen, and willing to compromise and make sacrifices. This person should also be willing to take constructive criticism and be able to admit when they are wrong. You will know when you get this gift because it will be an experience that you will never want to end! This is a gift that you should be willing to protect by any means necessary and when given this gift you should do your best to never lose or have this gift “taken away”. This gift is so special that it should be treated as one of your most valuable possessions because in reality you may not have a second chance to receive this gift. Although this gift is so special it doesn’t come with an instruction manual or a guide on how to probably care for it. This knowledge is gained by trial and error and if the person really wants you to have this gift they will be patient enough to allow you to make a mistake or two until you get it right!!! Don’t be a fool though you have to know that eventually that patience wears thin and then runs out!! This gift is a woman’s heart!!! A woman’s heart is a very special gift. If she gives it to a person and they choose to not protect it then they don’t deserve it!! I know… I have lost this gift not once but twice!!!
Time waits for no one and once it is gone you can never get it back. In life there are certain things that you have to learn. Supposedly patience is one of those things. But while you are being patient aren’t you wasting time? What is a reasonable amount of time to wait for anything? How long should you wait on someone to get himself or herself together? These are just random questions that I have been thinking lately while I have been reading different books and talking to different people. In life there are a bunch of uncertainties and things normally never go as planned. What do you do then? When something doesn’t go as you once planned do you move forward and roll on or do you use those events as an excuse to be mad at the world? Me personally I try to take bad situations learn from them and just move forward because what’s done is done and there isn’t anything we can do after it has happened, but I am starting to see that even for me it is not always that simple!!
Talk is CHEAP!! Yes I know it sounds a bit cliché’ but I am starting to really see just how cheap it is. I am so tired of people telling me one thing and then going and doing the exact opposite. I mean at what point do you start to lose your credibility? Recent events are teaching me to believe none of what I hear and only half of what I see because people can always say what you want to hear and for a brief stretch they can tailor their actions to those same words. Someone once told me “words are just words; actions are what count” and I am starting to see this statement for what it really is!!!
What happens when you date someone and then hear I think we are better off as just friends? Me I have always been a friend first romance later type of guy anyway. I want to get to know a person inside and out before I decide to just up and jump in a relationship with them. I guess my question is what make you want to be friends but don’t want to be romantically involved? How do you differentiate between who remains a friend and who you actually want to be with? What keeps the other person from thinking well damn if I’m not good enough to be with why would you want me as a friend? If you develop feelings for a person are you able to go back to being that same friend or will there be too much damage done from the feeling of being rejected? Yea I know this has been pretty random but these are just some of the thoughts going on in my mind currently!!
All of the hoopla over February 14th is really becoming sickening!! I mean really people go out and spend an abundance of money to supposedly show someone how much they care about them on that day!! Whoop dee eff’n doo lol No seriously though a year is 365 days so what about the other 364 days? Do you not still love that person or is it just not acceptable to show that you love them on that day? It’s funny because once upon a time valentine’s day was one of my favorite holidays because I believed in love and everything that love had to offer but here lately I’m starting to see that love really doesn’t mean much of anything! When I was younger I was taught love conquers all and if you love yourself and/or whoever you are with you can make it through anything. As I have gotten older and especially recently I am starting to see that this is not true. There is nothing that can work on love alone. Love doesn’t pay bills! Love doesn’t get you ahead in life nor does it get you a college degree. Naw what gets you what you want out of life is not love its hard-work, dedication, and sacrifice!!! I’m also realizing it is even harder to love someone when in reality they don’t want to be loved!!! I’m the type of guy that if I really love someone I am willing to sacrifice whatever I need to in order to make that person happy and those who really know me know this to be true. A lot of people talk about wanting to have somebody to love them for them, someone to share forever with, and other “bs” like that but how many of them really mean it? There are things that love can do. Love can really make you feel unappreciated!! When in love you do things that you normally wouldn’t do and if the person you are in love with is not putting forth the same effort or does not love you then you really are getting a raw deal!!! Love can make you lose things like your mind, (needing therapy after being heartbroken) your life (having to start over after being left in a bad situation) and possibly your best friend. So I apologize now if I seem a bit negative towards February 14th but at this point I really do not have a reason to celebrate Valentine’s Day because seemingly love has passed me up again so far this year!! For all of the people in love right now I wish you all the very best as you celebrate valentine’s day but for those of you who are like me I want to be the first to wish you a HAPPY ANTI-LOVE DAY
Ok this is very random but this is a love letter composed of song titles hope you enjoy
My homie, lover, friend, we have had our good times and our bad times. Once upon a time we made the decision to separate and while we were apart I realized that none else comes close to making me feel the way that you do. I am extremely happy that things came back full circle. I do realize that you are still brokenhearted and need a little understanding from me. I hope that you know that no matter what you are going through I’ll be there. I also just want to say that I want you back and you are my good thang. When I’m with you something comes over me and let’s me know that when God made you He indeed made an angel. I hope that one day we can share an everlasting love and I’ll get down on one knee and say let’s get married.I’m sorry for the pain that I have caused you and I’m here on bended knee asking you to give me another chance. These last couple of days I have been crying uncontrollably and nobody knows it but me!! We know everything about each other and rest assured your secrets are safe with me. I love the way you make me feel and the closer I get to you it makes me want to trade it all just to have the opportunity to call you my boo. I truly believe that you are heaven sent and have waited all my life to have someone like you. Yes we will have our differences but as long, as we be careful and take care of home everything will be all right!! I know that you still have questions about me and wonder if I can really stay down but you can rest assured I know that you are irreplaceable. I never thought I could feel this way about anyone but something about you has gotten me lost in love and I’d give anything to have you home again. I will do anything for you but I really need to know can you stand the rain?If it isn’t love why did you cry me a river on my shoulder. I crave for your crazy love and hope that we can try again.Just in case I hadn’t told you, I am so fortunate to have a P.Y.T. like you in my life. I realize a woman’s worth and I refuse to lose you over senseless, selfish emotions. Baby I want to cater to you and treat you like the superstar that you are!! Cause I love you I am willing to accept you flaws and all even though I know you are working to correct them. Here I am saying baby I’m yours through the good, bad, and ugly and I pray that your love don’t change. I’m crazy over you and my question to you is can you handle it?I’ll wait for you until you get yourself together even if that means waiting til the end of time!!Baby will you give your past one last cry and let it go so that we can complete this Cinderella story?
With so much going on these days I just want to take time to give thanks to the educators of our children. Until recently I never realized how much “bs” that the educators of America have to put up with. Not only do they have to teach the kids but they also have to deal with the politics associated with being a teacher.
Imagine being the parent of 100+ kids. Yes I know its very difficult to do and you are probably thinking no one in their right mind would ever have that many kids! But hey couldn’t you compare that to being a schoolteacher.
Stay with me, a parent has to know how to deal with the different personalities of all of their kids. Well so does a teacher. There are no 2 students who are exactly alike so the teacher has to know how to get each student to stay on task and also have to be able to find ways to get the best out of every student.
A parent has to discipline their child. Guess what so does a teacher. Every now and then you will have students who get out of line and you have to find ways to deal with it. Yes I know my thought would be send them to the office and not deal with them. What good is that going to do the next day they will be right back in class dong the same thing and you can’t send them to the office too many times because then the administration start looking at you as if you cannot control your students and question your abilities as a teacher.
A parent cares about their child and wants to make a difference in their life. What other reason would there be to be a teacher other than wanting to make a difference in a child’s life. I mean the profession is probably one the most important yet underpaid professions out there so there has to be the self gratification that yes I did make a difference that keeps them going.
A parent teaches his child life lessons and right from wrong. While in their class the good teachers hope to reach at least on child and hope that they can teach at least one person something that will help them out throughout the rest of their life.
A parent has to have patience when they are teaching their child new things. So does that child’s teacher! I know there are some days that these men and women want to just walk out the classroom or question why they even give a damn. Thankfully they maintain that patience and dedicate themselves daily to help our youth succeed in the “real world”.
I just want to take the time to say THANK YOU to the great men and women who take on the very unenvious task of being an educator in the school systems all over America.Thank you for dealing with our kids on their best and worst days. Thanks for having the patience to want to teach our kids the basics they need for success. Thanks for giving those kids who may not have a stable environment something positive to look at!!! To the parents of the kids train your children right!! There is only so much a teacher can do in the 55 minutes a day that they have your child. That is your child and it is your job to raise them correctly. Support that teacher if they call you about a problem with your child then more than likely your child is messing up somewhere. Don’t fall for the excuses like “she just don’t like me” or “the whole class failed that test”! Don’t go to the school acting a fool talking about why did you give my child a “f”? Instead turn around and ask your child what didn’t you do to earn this “f”!! Once again thanks to the educators of America you guys are the BEST!!!
No I’m not a teacher but I know a few and this is just some of the problems they deal with on a daily basis!! Feel free to comment and add your own. LOL
I wrote this a while back but recent events made me go back and reread it!!! So I decided to post it again!!
In the beginning “it’s all good” you are both clicking on the same page and everything seems to be going perfect. You spend countless hours together and you always seem to be “on the town”. You have wooed her with fine dining, movies, concerts, etc and she starts to think you are everything that she has ever wanted…then you stop!!!
So now you all are fussing and fighting over every little thing and you say she is “tripping” about whatever. In reality she is tripping because she was tricked. You tricked her into thinking you could take care of her every need. (freaks get ya mind out the gutter that’s not the only need) She was bamboozled into taking a chance and giving her heart to someone who she thought would treat it with care.
Now she doesn’t do what she used to do for you and you start to question what happened? You start to question her faithfulness and her every move. You figure there has to be some other guy (or girl) who has come in and swept her off her feet. She starts coming in a little later and now you sit at home and wonder what she is/was doing. You assume she has been cheating so you develop the mentality that “hell if she can do it so can I” and that is when everything really goes downhill.
All of this could have been avoided if you just handled your business. The things you did to sweep her off her feet continue to do them. If you randomly sent gifts (roses, balloons, etc.) in the beginning, then do not start waiting on special occasions (birthdays, holidays) to send them now! Many woman can appreciate a man who understands the little things in life really make them smile. Of course they like rings and bracelets and things of that nature but deep inside it makes them smile more when a small token of love is given from the heart.
Over the years I have learned that a woman just wants to feel wanted. She wants a guy who notices things about her. Point out that she has a new hair style or acknowledge the new perfume or lotion she is wearing. Chances are she made the change and really hopes that you notice it.. Someone who is going to tell her how beautiful she is. She also wants someone who appreciates what she does for him. If she cooks you dinner on a regular basis, washes your clothes, etc fellas just say thank you once in a while. Better yet how about you reciprocate. How about you cook for her, or if you can’t cook take her out (and im not talking applebee’s either), or try this one order in a good meal and cuddle up and watch a movie.
I guess I said all of that to say fellas if you got a good woman APPRECIATE HER. Make her feel special on days other than her birthday or Valentine’s Day. Make her feel like she is everything that you could ever want and need in a woman because in reality she probably is and if you don’t you will never get what you really want!!! Sorry for falling into the trap!!!
As I lay here excited about the historic events that will take place later today I realize how proud I am to be a “Black” American. Now don’t take that statement and assume that this is going to be a shot at the other ethnic groups because it is not that kind of party. But I mean why wouldn’t you be proud to be Black?!?!?! We are dominating the music industry holding down 3 of the top 5 spots on billboards top 100. We dominate in most sports. I’m just saying everyone knows about the NFL and NBA but what about golf (Tiger Woods), tennis (the Williams’ sisters), soccer, (Freddie Adu may get an argument from the David Becham fans but imma go with Freddie on this one) MLB (Barry Bonds most home runs of all time oh and Hank Aaron also a black man is number 2) what’s left hockey? Umm yea about that unfortunately we did more roller-skating than ice skating and besides our attitudes are too bad to give us a stick and let us fight. Lol We have one of the best naw let me change that we have the BEST talk show host ever in Oprah and Tyra is trying to set herself up to be her successor. (Ok maybe pushing it with Tyra but you get the point) We have always had the hottest and most interesting celebrity couples: Ike and Tina, Rick James and Teena Marie (I said interesting lol) Jay-Z and Beyonce’, The Obamas, and not to mention Darian and Ahhhh maybe one day. (Ok I’m done) The best speaker in MLK Jr. and now we are about to add President of the United States to this list WOW!!!! So yes I am excited and very proud to be a part of history. I am glad to see that centuries of hard work and dedication have not gone completely in vain. I am proud to see that we are edging closer and closer to achieving “the dream”!!! We as a people have struggled since they brought us over here as slaves! We struggled when Lincoln freed the slaves! We struggled going through the Underground Railroad trying to escape sure death in hopes of one day rising up and showing what we can really do! We struggled from the time when Ms. Parks wouldn’t give up her seat to the time Dr. King made his speech!! We struggled through the Rodney King riots and hell we are still struggling with Dr. Ian’s diets!! But it’s because of that struggle that on this day of this year we can stand and cheer because Mr. Barack Obama and his visions of change are finally here!!! Now black people let’s not be naïve, yes we are staring at change but there is so much more for us to achieve!!! Now as we take this day and pat each other on the back let us not forget that “they” ain’t giving us no slack!!!Now I can’t speak for he or she but I’m proud to be a “BLACK” American why wouldn’t I be?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Ok what’s really going on in my city? You know I hear mayor Herenton saying Memphis is a big city and we are doing big things but I am simply not seeing it!!! Ok true enough he got us a professional sports team, (which we half support) a new arena, and the downtown beautification project seems to be going well but what about the small stuff. I’m talking about the things that the citizens of Memphis deal with on a daily basis. Ok thanks Mayor Herenton for this new arena but hey did we think about the parking garage that goes along with it? How about the congestion downtown because the geniuses of the Memphis police department want to block off all the streets downtown to “control” traffic. Does anyone else see the issue with blocking off the streets that would make it easier to navigate to and from downtown? Another thing why does it take a long time to do ANYTHING dealing with the government in Memphis? I was at the unemployment office for 5 eff’n hours last week. In case you missed it FIVE hours to speak to someone about getting unemployment. The bad part about the whole ordeal is that when I finally went to the back I was only back there maybe 15 minutes so what in the heck were they doing with the people before me. Furthermore on the unemployment website there is a link to file online in Memphis but when you click on it you get a message that says this feature is not available at this time!!! How stupid is that? This is 2009 and we (the city of Memphis, Shelby county, or whoever is in charge of that page cannot get a freakin’ weblink to work) I am starting to believe the Memphis government has the Memphis club mentality we will make sure we have a long line so people will want to come in!!! Speaking of the clubs here why does it take so long for “security” to get the people in the clubs? I mean with everything that goes on in these clubs the searches they do cannot be that thorough. I have been to clubs and other parties in other cities (New Orleans, Atlanta, Chicago, even Nashville) and have never waited in line as long as I did in Memphis. That was back in my younger days I don’t club nearly as much as I used to so I really don’t care what they do now. I am concerned about the quality of nightlife/entertainment for those who do not like clubs or for those who want to be in a laid back adult atmosphere. What are those people to do for fun? I am currently dating a woman who hates clubs but she loves music. Where are we supposed to go to just chill have a drink and maybe do a little dancing and just enjoy each other’s company? The movies and dinner get old really quick and this young lady has said she wants a man who will date her for 50 years. Not meaning she wants to just date forever meaning that if something blossoms and we settle down she still wants her and her husband to date and do the things that got them to that point and I can respect that but in Memphis damn that may be hard!!! The only thing big city about Memphis is the crime rate!! Is it me or do we (Memphis) need to step our game off before we start shooting off and want to be recognized as a big city????
On Saturday I enjoyed an afternoon of listening to music with a good friend. While sitting around we got to pulling out cds and listening to “old school” music. Now when I say old school I’m not talking about our parents music (which a lot of us grew up on) I’m talking our old “new” school. Artists like H-Town (knockin’ da boots) Tevin Campbell, Tony Toni Tone, Uncle Sam, Sam Salter, Jesse Powell, Shai, Donnell Jones, Rome, Jodeci, Mint Condition (breaking my heart) okay ya’ll get the picture. Don’t get me wrong we enjoyed the rap as well DJ Jimi (“where they at” and “there’s some garden tools in this house” lmao, the old no limit ( silk the shocker, master p, mia x the pre lil romeo era lol), a couple of Memphis classics Mr. Big (eightball and MJG) getting it on (playa fly) act like you don’t know. Songs for the most part that would either get your party started or make you wanna grab somebody and hold em’ close!!! What happened to that? These days any ole Joe off the street can make a song and “hot” 107 (and I use that word hot very loosely) will give it plenty of airtime. Now I’m not hating if this is how they making money go ahead and do ya thang but damn come with some substance. I mean come on “that baby don’t look like me WTF? The song was funny and all but geez should it really be in every hour hell OR everyday rotation?Soulja boy give me a break how many times could you possibly crank anything?!!! And also what’s up with all of the nursery rhyme hooks? Is there a new rap manual out that says in order to make a hit you have to find a lullaby and make a song out of it?!!! Lets not talk about the R&B circuit. True enough we have good young talented artists like Jazmine Sullivan and Trey Songz to go along with seasoned vets like Alicia Keys, Ne-Yo, Beyonce’, Musiq Soulchild, Mary J., Usher, John Legend etc.who can flat out sang and entertain. There are also sleepers like Pretty Willie, Urban Mystic, and Raheem Devaughn who can hold there own and set a mood LOL but the thing that kills me are these jokers who just mess R&B all up!!! The perfect example is Pretty Ricky. First off how you gone name yourself Pretty Ricky and there are like 35 of ya’ll in the group. Secondly are you singers or rappers? Unfortunately someone listens to their garbage so they stay around. Last thing and I’m going to leave them alone where in the heck do you get off remaking classics like H-Town’s “knocking da boots” and adding rap verses to it *sigh* and what may be worse is On BET the new member had the nerve to start singing Mint Condition’s pretty brown eyes and sounded a hot mess!!!! I’m sorry but if this is the quality product being put out these days I see why limewire and other file sharing sites are so big how could you expect someone to spend his or her hard earned money on this garbage. What happened to the days of putting a 12 or 13 song cd in and letting it play. Now you buy a cd with 16-20 songs on it and may only listen to 3… the madness must stop somebody help me out!!!!
There is a certain gift that you do not get on birthdays, anniversaries, or Christmas! This gift does not come in a box or gift-wrapped and it normally comes when you least expect it! This gift is not a physical gift yet you can still see and feel it!! This particular gift is probably the most fragile gift you will ever receive however this gift cannot be bought in stores, online, or anywhere else for that matter! Personally I think this is one of the most precious gifts you can ever receive and it takes a special person to accept this gift. The person receiving this gift has to be strong, willing to listen, and willing to compromise and make sacrifices. This person should also be willing to take constructive criticism and be able to admit when they are wrong. You will know when you get this gift because it will be an experience that you will never want to end! This is a gift that you should be willing to protect by any means necessary and when given this gift you should do your best to never lose or have this gift “taken away”. This gift is so special that it should be treated as one of your most valuable possessions because in reality you may not have a second chance to receive this gift. Although this gift is so special it doesn’t come with an instruction manual or a guide on how to probably care for it. This knowledge is gained by trial and error and if the person really wants you to have this gift they will be patient enough to allow you to make a mistake or two until you get it right!!! Don’t be a fool though you have to know that eventually that patience wears thin and then runs out!! This gift is a woman’s heart!!! A woman’s heart is a very special gift. If she gives it to a person and they choose to not protect it then they don’t deserve it!! I know… I have lost this gift not once but twice!!!
